America's Next Author background
Dave Hill, Jr writing contest
Tweets by Dave Hill, Jr

Dave Hill, Jr

Dave has been writing for as long as he can remember. He is an active member of an online writer's workshop where he is reshaping years of documentary style reporting into narrative fiction. So far it's going really well. He has a wealth of stories to tell and can't wait to do so.

Story: This Little Mind

Reviews

Ashley M

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Great story! I was pleasantly surprised with how the story started and circled around to the end to pull it all together. I wanted to continue reading on to see what was going to happen throughout, it was tense and suspenseful in just the right amounts. I like the gun detail as well..I usually don't like authors to go to into too much technical stuff but enough to know they know what they are talking about, but it was brief and later made more sense to why it was needed. I would def. read a novel written by this author!

rina

Rating starRating starRating starRating star
Great story, very well told. I kept seeing visions of a "Law and Order" scene (not anything specific...just the essence of one). The technical information on the gun trigger, amount of pressure, etc could have been...edited a bit, but was a great edition of technical knowledge a professional would have and appreciate. I enjoyed the love felt for his daughter and that she anchors him as no one else can.

Lisa Rose

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Very good story. I was on the edge of my chair... hoping that everything would work out. The scene with the daughter was so sweet and the ending was just right. If you have the time please read my story, 'Drift Away' and leave a review to let me know if you liked it.

Shawna

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Wow! Great insight on what it is like to be a cop. I had to remind myself to breath and unclench my fists several times. I enjoyed your story immensely. Keep up the great writing!

AuntieOakley

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Great story! Very well-written. Would love to be your proof-reader for spelling/grammar...b/c it would mean I'd get to read your stories early on! ;-) Reminded me a bit of Mickey Spillane stories.

A L Motsy

Rating starRating starRating star
A story that held my attention from beginning to end. Well done.

Sniper

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
An Amazing story, reading this one and have read past stories from this author... they only get better. Can't wait to buy the first book!

txkate

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Great story, loved the play-by-play detail of the near shooting!

txcowboy1954

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Awesome story, beautifully written. I enjoy the detail. As good as any crime novelist I've ever read.

PennilessWriter

Rating starRating starRating star
This was a good read, very well informed, and had one of the most satisfying endings I've seen in this competition. I thought the scene with the daughter was really sweet, but just on the verge of being too much and not quite real, especially with the rest of the story being quite starkly realistic. The ending did raise questions about the past, because Steve was very accomodating and understanding in a way that makes the reader wonder why. That could be intentional, but I don't think it could hurt to throw a little light on it. It would also be beneficial to introduce Steve in some way closer to the beginning, because he is clearly much more important to the narrator than Travis is, and it's a little bit jarring that at the very end of the story, this person who knows our protagonist so well shows up and helps him without of word of explanation needed between them, and we didn't even know he existed prior to that. If he can be mentioned early in the story and some allusion made to their history together, that final scene could be a lot more poignant and we would get a lot more character insight.

Tom Engelhart

Rating starRating starRating starRating star
Nice story. Cool twist. The stream of consciousness was a little too drawn out. I felt that I really had to trudge through to get to the end, which luckily is satisfying, but you may need to streamline it a bit. You are clearly very knowledgeable about the topic, or at least you sell that well. But Some of the descriptions can get tedious and feel like more of a manual than a piece of fiction. Also, some of the pop culture references seem out of place. They were funny, but I'm not sure if you meant them that way. All together, nice tale of suspense with a twist. P.S. I'd appreciate it if you read mine, "Hysterical Strength."

Leslie Hill

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Great job. Very talented writer. Cops must be brave on a daily basis and while there job might make them jaded they often have a more intense love for those near and dear to them! The writer expresses this deep emotion in this story.

Nikki Stair

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
This is wonderful!!! It's interesting, precious with the daughter, and suspenseful. Knowing you personally it just solidified my respect for our law enforcement officers. You guys and gals put your life on the line everyday to protect us. It is greatly appreciated!! Any one that reads this will get to experience the emotions as you've so beautifully illustrates the scene for us. Well done!! Loved it! Looking forward to more!!

ChristyHill

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Fantastic story, heart warming ending. Love the writing style. Can't wait to read future stories. Keep up the great work.

Hands On Healing

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Great Story. Well written pulls you in. You are in suspense and come to understand the slowness of an intense situation. It also has a sweet note to it.

baggyk

Rating starRating starRating starRating star
In a contest where so many stories are marked "thriller" or "suspense" this is the only one that actually delivers that in a genuine way on the planet we live on, in the realm we live in, with characters who look and sound like human-beings. This is a "slice of life" story that deserves a larger audience.

Danny

Rating starRating starRating starRating star
Nice story. I like it because the author clearly has a working knowledge of the police field which he applies well to the story plus he shows us the dangerousness of the job combined with the dedication to his daughter. It's humane without being overly sentimental.

Rating starRating starRating starRating star
very good read.

anach

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Tense, well-structured and strong on character development. Great story, Dave!

Lj

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
It was such a great read. I am so impressed.

vettech

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Good story. Enjoyed it very much. Hope to read more from this author in the future.

Meredith

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
This story gives a realistic view of the volatile day to day existence of one police officer. It has equal parts of sweetness and grit. I found it riveting--such a graceful mix of humanity and violence. Every emotion he experiences is amplified by the next contrast he encounters right around the corner. Very well done.

ShirleyJ

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
Even better since I know the charcters.

TexasFlash

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
I enjoyed this story very much. Had a very realistic feel and drew the reader into the story immediately. The author gave a realistic glimpse into the details surrounding a typical, routine episode police deal with that is anything but typical or routine to the parites involved; an episode that wouldn't even make it to the evening news... I was engaged from beginning to end....well done!

Paininspires

Rating starRating starRating starRating starRating star
I thought this story was excellent you can tell someone with experience of being a cop wrote it. It has the grit I would expect with a police officer story but really captures the slowness of time during an intense moment. Great story added sweet note about the daughter.

Leave a review

You have to be logged in to comment. Log in
Not a great read
Masterpiece
AUTHOR RANK
-
Loading..
DECEMBER 18th 2012
The winner of America's Next Author 2012 has been announced! [...]
DECEMBER 7th 2012
Questions and answers about the Battle Round. [...]
America's Next Author

#ANA2012 | What Fans Have To Say

About

America's Next Author is the first social writing contest. Friends, family, fans and publishing industry experts will read authors' submissions and nominate their favorite to be America's next major author. Everyone can participate!