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Kai Jarvis

I'm originally from Hawaii. Just moved to Portland a few years back. This story was a work of inspiration. I really enjoyed the process, and I hope you enjoy it's fruits.

Story: Reaching

Reviews

Kai Jarvis

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It's actually not a "magic pill" but it could definitely been seen that way. It's called ibogaine, and it's a root extract made from "Iboga." When I first found out about it it seemed to good to be true, I invite both of you to check it out. Why it isn't being more thoroughly tested or explored I have no idea.

Alyce Wilson

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If I read this correctly, it seems as if this is supposed to be a blend between a gritty literary fiction piece and SF. If that's true, this guy's "magic pill" for addiction needs to be described as such. Since you're using third-person semi-omniscient, you could easily describe the man's hopes: has he been developing this pill for a while? Is it his first time testing it? I feel as if there's more to this story, as intriguing as what you've put to paper already is. Please take a moment to read my story, "Dating Safari," and share your comments.

Venus

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I don't know your knowledge of addiction, but there is no magic pill in the real world. No offense, but male writers seem to have a fascination with hookers and strippers as their protagonists. Expand your mind. Most women have lots of problems - hooking not being one of them. It nice to know that man is still the best way for a woman to get out of her way. Keep writing and reading.

Lisa Rose

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I liked the message of your story. It's like the Stones' song: You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you get what you need. I did notice a few mistakes in capitalization and punctuation, no big deal. But if you want to proof-read again and submit another version they will swap it out for you. If you have the time please read my story 'Drift Away' and leave a review to let me know if you liked it.

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DECEMBER 18th 2012
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DECEMBER 7th 2012
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America's Next Author is the first social writing contest. Friends, family, fans and publishing industry experts will read authors' submissions and nominate their favorite to be America's next major author. Everyone can participate!