Butch's letter:
Dear Poinsettia,
Brace yourself.
Dad and Mom went down in a plane crash over the Black Sea six months ago. I kept them alive by sending faux e-mails from them to you. Why ? $10,000,000. Big Burgess took out a ten million dollar life insurance policy on his life and on Little Maggie's. I had my girlfriend impersonate you at the lawyer's office and I got your half of the ten million dollars for myself. Our beloved family home in Live Oak Country Club has a foreclosure sign tacked on the front gate, because I lost that too. I blew all of our ten million dollar inheritance in four months and you my dear are as broke as a bag lady with an empty cart.
P.S. I held on to something that's close to your heart. It's the least that I could do. You still have your candy apple red Mercedes that Daddy gave you on your 25th birthday. It is hidden in our secret place because the repo man is in hot pursuit of it. Love,
Brother Butch
