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Story: The Fatal Mistake

Reviews

Lisa Rose

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I liked it. Interesting story, it kept my attention throughout, although you do use a lot of short sentences. For example (I felt defeated. They were going to find me. The Nerenos searched the room.) Try combining several of the short sentences into one. (As the Nerenos searched the room, I felt defeated; I knew they were going to find me crouching in the closet.) Of course this is only my opinion, I'm not an expert. If you have the time, would write a review on my story Drift Away and let me know what you think. Thanks.

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December 18th, 2012
The winner of America's Next Author 2012 has been announced! [...]
December 7th, 2012
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America's Next Author is the first social writing contest. Friends, family, fans and publishing industry experts will read authors' submissions and nominate their favorite to be America's next major author. Everyone can participate!